Till it Bleeds
by Hibikime
Summary: Ryou could take the pain as long as he wasn't alone. The fine line between love and hatred a blur, he loved the one person he should hate. Warnings-yaoi. RyouXBakura


Authors note: Hi! This is Hibikime.and wow.I finished the first chapter! Yeah! Okay, this is my first Yu-gi-oh fanfic.actually my first fanfic in three years. I decided to take a break from my novel and begin fanfiction again.  
  
Anyway, I don't own Yu-gi-oh or any of its characters. I own only my deck.*huggles harpie lady sisters and Performance of the sword cards close* and no one can beat me mwahahaha.actually I only duel my little brother..  
  
Anyway on to the story.please tell me if I should continue.  
  
Till it Bleeds By  
  
~Wish I was too dead to cry My self-affliction fades Stones to throw at my creator Masochists to which I cater~  
  
I couldn't help the tirade of tears that fell down from my eyes. Once I believed that something in me deserved his hatred. Some weakness only he could see when he stared down into my eyes. That all this pain was the price I would be forced to pay to keep him near me.  
  
I was so innocently wrong. Naivety is a wonderful thing I no longer cling to. My innocence has long since been distinguished by unwavering hatred rained down in a series of blows I will never avoid. I never knew you could love and hate someone in such perfect harmony, I do know, Ra I wish I didn't.  
  
I wish I had never been given the ring, never released him. But even as I say that I know that I would have it no other way. I love him, and yet I can see myself dying by his hands.  
  
~You don't need to bother I don't need to be I'll keep slipping farther But once I hold on I won't let go 'til it bleeds~  
  
Looking up, my eyes barely focus on the form in front of me, but I don't have to see to know that my double is about to land another blow. Black tinged my vision as the familiar onslaught of tranquility hits. I always can tell now, minutes before I collapse, the blessed numbness.  
  
Just as I begin to slip further the pain stops. Looking up through red tinged vision I almost though I saw him falter. The final blow never came as it always does. The final hit that sends me over the edge to complete unconsciousness.  
  
"Why don't you leave?" he demands.  
  
~Wish I was too dead to care If indeed I cared at all Never had a voice to protest So you fed me sh** to digest I wish I had a reason My flaws are open season~  
  
Because I deserve this, because I am weak and that is why he hates me. Many answers to that particular question always come to mind.he asks it enough. So often I have found myself asking that. But for this undeniable and completely insane love I feel I stay.  
  
~For this, I gave up trying One good turn deserves my dying~  
  
Closing my eyes my head lolls to rest against the hard floor that is cushioning my battered body. I don't want to look anymore. Nothing I haven't seen before, and something I know I will feel again.  
  
Though something does cut through my haze. A hand gently brushing aside my hair stained red by my own blood. I don't move, afraid that if he knows that I am not truly unconscious he will pull back. Yet I can't help but wonder the sudden change. Normally I really do not think he would care if I lived or died. Nor do I even care anymore.  
  
I realized long ago that is why I stay here. I am addicted to you, and I don't think I will ever truly be able to let go. Even with the pain I can tolerate it because at least when that iron fist descends you are touching me. Despite the fact that it is brought down in hate, reminding me that I hate him. Hate that I him you so much I allow myself to be put in such a situation.  
  
Wish I'd died instead of lived A zombie hides my face Shell forgotten With its memories Diaries left With cryptic entries  
  
I wish that if I opened my eyes he would still care. But what would it matter. Nothing really does as I cling from one day to the next, drifting in my haze. My friends a long forgotten memory. Do they even know I still live? Ra does he know what this does to me?  
  
I force the thought out of my mind and forget.forget that I am lying on the cold floor bleeding. Forget the pain, forget the hate. It is so easy to ignore, the reality to hard to accept. I am addicted to the pain as I am addicted to the pain as much as anything else.  
  
~And you don't need to bother I don't need to be I'll keep slipping farther But once I hold on I won't let go 'til it bleeds~  
  
This cycle will never end. I know it wont. I cannot help what I feel, and I know I will never stop him. This endless circle. Love. Hate. Bakura. I am bleeding again.  
  
AN: Well.how was it, be brutally honest.. Oh and the song is "bother" by Stone Sour. 


End file.
